Posts
All along in the back of my mind I had
Ya, that's not happening as easily as I had hoped it would.
It's been 3 weeks since he started school. So about 6 drop-off/pick-up opportunities have come and gone. There's been eye contact and friendly smiles, but that's as far as the communication level has gone so far.
This always happens to me. This is why I have such bad anxiety. I over analyze things. Do I look like a mean person? Is it something that I'm wearing? Is it my age? Did D Boy do something to their kid in class?
Then again, at the same time, I'm not approaching them either... maybe they're thinking the same things that I am.
BUT
Why do I always have to be the one to make the first move?
I feel like I'm always the one who ends up initiating conversation. I'm always the one with a big friendly smile planted on my face trying to make people feel comfortable talking to me. I always end up over complimenting and praising people to try and get people to like me and talk to me.
Don't get me wrong, I mean the nice things that I say, but sometimes it just comes out of my mouth before I even know what I'm saying. So even if the person I'm talking to may not be the nicest person in the world or doesn't even know how to give out compliments themselves, I still end up blowing up their ego tank even more by my complimentary word diarrhea.
Growing up my grandma had told me, "Treat others as you want to be treated." I think the older I get, the more I follow that rule.
The point is, is that it'd be nice to be approached for once when meeting new people. It'd make me feel really good to have someone show interest and say something nice to me just out of the blue and not as a response to my first approach.
Maybe I'm just too nice of a person. Maybe I need to realize that not everyone feels that they have to show and say their feelings towards other people all the time like I do.
I might've digressed a little there. Oops!
Anyways, it looks like I'll have to make a move here soon!
Wish me luck!
6 comments:
It's so hard, right? I swear that none of the Moms would talk to me if I weren't wearing a leg brace that looked like a nuclear missle launcher! It's quite the conversation starter. Since I am quite outgoing myself and could start a conversation with a rock, I usually make the first move. As a matter of fact, I make goals to be friends with the people who seem the least likely to talk to me. It usually turns out that they're just really shy...who knew?
Oh my gosh Shandal, I could have written this exact same post! I've been dropping off/picking up at preschool for over a year now, and do you think I've made one friend?! NO. Yes, the odd "HI", smile, and small talk, but that's it. Before preschool started, I had these grand ideas that I would be making tons of friends and we could all hang out together and have playdates. NOT SO MUCH! Booooo Hooooo. I agree, why do I always have to be the first to say hello! I'm the shy one!
No I really wished we lived closer!!!
It seems like the older I get, the harder it is to make friends. I don't know when it got so awkward!
Good luck with it and I'm sure you'll be fine. How could they NOT love you?? :)
You are probably always the first to initiate because you're stronger and healthier than your average person. I'm the same way and I used to over-analyze it too. When it comes down to it, most people are too busy being self-conscious to notice other people's self-consciousness.
I've always had this problem. When I enter a room, I'm quiet, reserved and I like to examine the situation. In return others see a bitchy girl that doesn't talk to anyone and looks over the entire room. Most of my friends said upon first meeting me they thought I was going to be a complete bitch... turns out I'm not and they are so glad they gave me a chance.
I think as we get older though it's harder. At least you are smiling and being friendly. Maybe it will take longer. Maybe one day make a comment about a mom's outfit, or her child's. Say you like item X and where did they find it etc. If they tell you the answer and don't respond anymore after that it's their loss.
I've always had the fear that once I have kids and or get married and then move away from friends I've had for years that it would be hard to make new ones. If only making friends IRL was as easy as while blogging. I'd totally get coffee with you and hang out! (And workout) ;)
Oh geez, girl.
This is the story of my life.
But guess what?
I stressed for a while about it and now I'm like, "Screw em, if they wanna be my friend, they have to come to me." I'll be nice, I'll smile, I'll talk, but if they really wanna be my friend, it's up to them. Cuz I'm a jerk like that.
Post a Comment