All along in the back of my mind I had
Ya, that's not happening as easily as I had hoped it would.
It's been 3 weeks since he started school. So about 6 drop-off/pick-up opportunities have come and gone. There's been eye contact and friendly smiles, but that's as far as the communication level has gone so far.
This always happens to me. This is why I have such bad anxiety. I over analyze things. Do I look like a mean person? Is it something that I'm wearing? Is it my age? Did D Boy do something to their kid in class?
Then again, at the same time, I'm not approaching them either... maybe they're thinking the same things that I am.
Why do I always have to be the one to make the first move?
I feel like I'm always the one who ends up initiating conversation. I'm always the one with a big friendly smile planted on my face trying to make people feel comfortable talking to me. I always end up over complimenting and praising people to try and get people to like me and talk to me.
Don't get me wrong, I mean the nice things that I say, but sometimes it just comes out of my mouth before I even know what I'm saying. So even if the person I'm talking to may not be the nicest person in the world or doesn't even know how to give out compliments themselves, I still end up blowing up their ego tank even more by my complimentary word diarrhea.
Growing up my grandma had told me, "Treat others as you want to be treated." I think the older I get, the more I follow that rule.
The point is, is that it'd be nice to be approached for once when meeting new people. It'd make me feel really good to have someone show interest and say something nice to me just out of the blue and not as a response to my first approach.
Maybe I'm just too nice of a person. Maybe I need to realize that not everyone feels that they have to show and say their feelings towards other people all the time like I do.
I might've digressed a little there. Oops!
Anyways, it looks like I'll have to make a move here soon!
Wish me luck!