Hello, Goodbye

Recently I did something big. HUGE. Something that took me months to get the courage to do. I knew that once it was done, that was it. There would be no going back.

It was time to clean house, my friends.

You see, I am was a clothes hoarder.

I had shirts in every size, S-XL.

I had jeans that ranged in SEVEN different sizes.

I just never knew if I would need that one shirt from back in the 90s. Maybe I could use some of the clothes as a Halloween costume or a maternity shirt or something.

I felt that I needed those jeans that were too big just in case I was having a "fat" day. I had to keep the jeans that were too small because "one day" I'll fit into those.

Well, that "one day" has come and gone. The jeans that were too small before, are now too big. Which is a little bittersweet.

Mostly sweet because it feels good that all of my hard work that I've put in the last 10 months has payed off. A little bitter because I had 15 pairs of jeans that didn't fit me anymore.

That is when I realized that basically my closet was loaded with clothes that I never wear. At first I was torn. I felt that I should keep them all just in case...

Just in case, what? In case I fall off the horse and fit in them again. I don't want that at all. So why make an excuse, why make it sound like a possibility?

I don't need those clothes. Keeping them would almost be a temptation. Like it's okay if I did fall off the horse because at least I wouldn't have to buy new clothes. All of them would be there waiting for me.

NO.NO.NO.

That is SUCH the wrong attitude to have. How could I possibly continue my life living healthy if I thought like that?

I needed a change. Something that symbolized that I'm not that person anymore.

So I got some trash bags out and cleaned out my closet. I filled two trash bags full of clothes. All of those jeans and all of the shirts that did not fit me or if I even had to think if I'd ever wear it again, are all gone.

My closet looks so bare now! I only have 2 new pairs of jeans and about half of the shirts.

There's no going back now. I figure it would take much more money effort to go back to my old ways. If I did, I'd have to go out and buy new clothes in a bigger size... who wants to have to go out and buy bigger sized clothes? To me, that's never a good feeling. So there's a new motivation for me too. I can't get off track of my healthy routine because I don't have any "fat" day clothes anymore.

I feel great about it, much lighter even.

So, hello to the new healthy me and goodbye to the old weak Shan.